Friday, March 11, 2011

On the topic of being anxious

I was observed this morning in my classroom. It didn't go the way I had planned because I totally forgot-or never realized to start with- that the band students were leaving at 10 for a field trip. That's half my class. My plan to finish with a neat little group activity didn't work. Oh, well. I made the best of it. I can only hope that this was suitable for my assistant principal...unlikely though. Nothing I ever do is.

It is Friday. The sun is shining. We've been in school ten weeks with no real break. The kids are off their rockers today (I should check the phase of the moon) and I am soooo ready for spring break. I'm emotionally spent after my observation. I can't get refocused and my kids aren't helping.

I'm have been anxious all day-before my observation, during it, after it-just ready to crawl out of my skin all day! It makes me think about the psalm where David says, "Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts" (139: 17). I identify with those words that come at the end of the psalm, but what comes at the beginning is so even better: "You have searched me, LORD, and you know me.  You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways."

It is so good to serve a God that knows us, inside and out.

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